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grandfather。 Granddad didn't seem to need any salt�察 �
which was a good thing because I might have thrown the shaker at him。
My sister and dad were all business as usual�察�though。 Lyta ate about two raisins out of
her carrot salad�察�then peeled the skin and meat off her
chicken wing and nibbled gristle off the bone�察�while my father filled up airspace talking about
office politics and the need for a shakedown in upper
management。
No one was listening to him ! no one ever does when he gets on one of his if´I´ran´the´
circus jags ! but for once Mom wasn't even pretending。
And for once she wasn't trying to convince Lyta that dinner was delicious either。 She just
kept eyeing me and Granddad�察�trying to pick up on why
we were miffed at each other。
Not that he had anything to be miffed at me about。 What had I done to him�察�anyway�拭�Nothing。
Nada。 But he was�察�I could tell。 And I pletely
avoided looking at him until about halfway through dinner�察�when I sneaked a peek。
He was studying me�察�all right。 And even though it wasn't a mean stare�察�or a hard stare�察�it was�察 �
you know�察�firm。 Steady。 And it weirded me out。
What was his deal�拭 �
I didn't look at him again。 Or at my mother。 I just went back to eating and pretended to listen
to my dad。 And the first chance I got�察�I excused myself
and holed up in my room。
I was planning to call my friend Garrett like I usually do when I'm bent about something。 I
even punched in his number�察�but I don't know。 I just hung
up。And later when my mom came in�察�I faked like I was sleeping。 I haven't done that in years。
The whole night was weird like that。 I just wanted to be
left alone。
Juli wasn't at the bus stop the next morning。 Or Friday morning。 She was at school�察�but you'd
never know it if you didn't actually look。 She didn't whip
´´´ Page 15´´´
her hand through the air trying to get the teacher to call on her or charge through the halls
getting to class。 She didn't make unsolicited ments for
the teacher's edification or challenge the kids who took cuts in the milk line。 She just sat。
Quiet。
I told myself I should be glad about it ! it was like she wasn't even there�察�and isn't that what
I'd always wanted�拭�But still�察�I felt bad。 About her tree�察 �
about how she hurried off to eat by herself in the library at lunch�察�about how her eyes were
red around the edges。 I wanted to tell her�察�Man�察�I'm sorry
about your sycamore tree�察�but the words never seemed to e out。
By the middle of the next week�察�they'd finished taking down the tree。 They cleared the lot and
even tried to pull up the stump�察�but that sucker would
not budge�察�so they wound up grinding it down into the dirt。
Juli still didn't show at the bus stop�察�and by the end of the week I learned from Garrett that
she was riding a bike。 He said he'd seen her on the
side of the road twice that week�察�putting the chain back on the derailleur of a rusty old ten´
speed。
I figured she'd be back。 It was a long ride out to Mayfield Junior High�察�and once she got over
the tree�察�she'd start riding the bus again。 I even
caught myself looking for her。 Not on the lookout�察�just looking。
Then one day it rained and I thought for sure she'd be up at the bus stop�察�but no。 Garrett said
he saw her trucking along on her bike in a bright
yellow poncho�察�and in math I noticed that her pants were still soaked from the knees down。
When math let out�察�I started to chase after her to tell her that she ought to try riding the bus
again�察�but I stopped myself in the nick of time。 What
was I thinking�拭�That Juli wouldn't take a little friendly concern and pletely misinterpret it�拭 �
Whoa now�察�buddy�察�beware� �Better to just leave well
enough alone。
After all�察�the last thing I needed was for Juli Baker to think I missed her。
The Sycamore Tree
I love to watch my father paint。 Or really�察�I love to hear him talk while he paints。 The words
always e out soft and somehow heavy when he's
brushing on the layers of a landscape。 Not sad。 Weary�察�maybe�察�but peaceful。
My father doesn't have a studio or anything�察�and since the garage is stuffed with things that
everyone thinks they need but no one ever uses�察�he
paints outside。
Outside is where the best landscapes are�察�only they're nowhere near our house。 So what he
does is keep a camera in his truck。 His job as a
mason takes him to lots of different locations�察�and he's always on the lookout for a great
sunrise or sunset�察�or even just a nice field with sheep or
cows。 Then he picks out one of the snapshots�察�clips it to his easel�察�and paints。
The paintings e out fine�察�but I've always felt a little sorry for him�察�having to paint beautiful
scenes in our backyard�察�which is not exactly
picturesque。 It never was much of a yard�察�but after I started raising chickens�察�things didn't
exactly improve。
Dad doesn't seem to see the backyard or the chickens when he's painting�察�though。 It's not
just the snapshot or the canvas he sees either。 It's
something much bigger。 He gets this look in his eye like he's transcended the yard�察�the
neighborhood�察�the world。 And as his big�察�callused hands
sweep a tiny brush against the canvas�察�it's almost like his body has been possessed by some
graceful spiritual being。
When I was little�察�my dad would let me sit beside him on the porch while he painted�察�as long
as I'd be quiet。 I don't do quiet easily�察�but I discovered
that after five or ten minutes without a peep�察�he'd start talking。
´´´ Page 16´´´
I've learned a lot about my dad that way。 He told me all sorts of stories about what he'd done
when he was my age�察�and other things�察�too!like
how he got his first job delivering hay�察�and how he wished he'd finished college。
When I got a little older�察�he still talked about himself and his childhood�察�but he also started
asking questions about me。 What were we learning at
school�拭�What book was I currently reading�拭�What did I think about this or that。
Then one time he surprised me and asked me about Bryce。 Why was I so crazy about Bryce�拭 �
I told him about his eyes and his hair and the way his cheeks blush�察�but I don't think I
explained it very well because when I was done Dad shook
his head and told me in soft�察�heavy words that I needed to start looking at the whole
landscape。
I didn't really know what he meant by that�察�but it made me want to argue with him。 How could
he possibly understand about Bryce�拭�He didn't know
him� �
But this was not an arguing spot。 Those were scattered throughout the house�察�but not out
here。
We were both quiet for a record´breaking amount of time before he kissed me on the
forehead and said�察 �Proper lighting is everything�察�Julianna。 ̄
Proper lighting�拭�What was that supposed to mean�拭�I sat there wondering�察�but I was afraid
that by asking I'd be admitting that I wasn't mature
enough to understand�察�and for some reason it felt obvious。 Like I should understand。
After that he didn't talk so much about events as he did about ideas。 And the older I got�察�the
more philosophical he seemed to get。 I don't know if
he really got more philosophical or if he just thought I could handle it now that I was in the
double digits。
Mostly the things he talked about floated around me�察�but once in a while something would
happen and I would understand exactly what he had
meant。 ^A painting is more than the sum of its parts�察院�he would tell me�察�and then go on to
explain how the cow by itself is just a cow�察�and the meadow
by itself is just grass and flowers�察�and the sun peeking through the trees is just a beam of
light�察�but put them all together and you've got magic。
I understood what he was saying�察�but I never felt what he was saying until one day when I
was up in the sycamore tree。
The sycamore tree had been at the top of the hill forever。 It was on a big vacant lot�察�giving
shade in the summer and a place for birds to nest in the
spring。 It had a built´in slide for us�察�too。 Its trunk bent up and around in almost a plete
spiral�察�and it was so much fun to ride down。 My mom told
me she thought the tree must have been damaged as a sapling but survived�察�and now�察 �
maybe a hundred years later�察�it was still there�察�the biggest
tree she'd ever seen。 ^A testimony to endurance ̄ is what she called it。
I had always played in the tree�察�but I didn't bee a serious climber until the fifth grade�察 �
when I went up to rescue a kite that was stuck in its
branches。 I'd first spotted the kite floating free through the air and then saw it dive´bomb
somewhere up the hill by the sycamore tree。
I've flown kites before and I know!sometimes they're gone forever�察�and sometimes they're
just waiting in the middle of the road for you to rescue
them。 Kites can be lucky or they can be ornery。 I've had both kinds�察�and a lucky kite is
definitely worth chasing after。
This kite looked lucky to me。 It wasn't anything fancy�察�just an old´fashioned diamond with
blue and yellow stripes。 But it stuttered along in a friendly
way�察�and when it dive´bombed�察�it seemed to do so from exhaustion as opposed to spite。
Ornery kites dive´bomb out of spite。 They never get
exhausted because they won't stay up long enough to poop out。 Thirty feet up they just sort
of smirk at you and crash for the fun of it。
´´´ Page 17´´´
So Champ and I ran up to Collier Street�察�and after scouting out the road�察�Champ started
barking at the sycamore tree。 I looked up and spotted it�察 �
too�察�flashing blue and yellow through the branches。
It was a long ways up�察�but I thought I'd give it a shot。 I shinnied up the trunk�察�took a shortcut
across the slide�察�and started climbing。 Champ kept a
good eye on me�察�barking me along�察�and soon I was higher than I'd ever been。 But still the
kite seemed forever away。
Then below me I noticed Bryce ing around the corner and through the vacant lot。 And I
could tell from the way he was looking up that this was
his kite。
What a lucky�察�lucky kite this was turning out to be� �
^Can you climb that high�拭院�he called up to me。
^Sure� 院�I called back。 And up�察�up�察�up I went� �
The branches were strong�察�with just the right amount of intersections to make climbing easy。
And the higher I got�察�the more amazed I was by the
view。 I'd never seen a view like that� �It was like being in an airplane above all the rooftops�察 �
above the other trees。 Above the world� �
Then I looked down。 Down at Bryce。 And suddenly I got dizzy and weak in the knees。 I was
miles off the ground� �Bryce shouted�察 �Can you reach
it�拭院 �
I caught my breath and managed to call down�察 �No problem� 院�then forced myself to
concentrate on those blue and yellow stripes�察�to focus on them
and only them as I shinnied up�察�up�察�up。 Finally I touched it�察�I grasped it�察�I had the kite in my
hand� �
But the string was tangled in the branches above and I couldn't seem to pull it free。 Bryce
called�察 �Break the string� 院�and somehow I managed to
do just that。
When I had the kite free�察�I needed a minute to rest。 To recover before starting down。 So
instead of looking at the ground below me�察�I held on tight
and looked out。 Out across the rooftops。
That's when the fear of being up so high began to lift�察�and in its place came the most
amazing feeling that I was flying。 Just soaring above the
earth�察�sailing among the clouds。
Then I began to notice how wonderful the breeze smelled。 It smelled like ´ sunshine。 Like
sunshine and wild grass and pomegranates and rain� �I
couldn't stop breathing it in�察�filling my lungs again and again with the sweetest smell I'd ever
known。
Bryce called up�察 �Are you stuck�拭院�which brought me down to earth。 Carefully I backed up�察 �
prized stripes in hand�察�and as I worked my way down�察�I
could see Bryce circling the tree�察�watching me to make sure I was okay。
By the time I hit the slide�察�the heady feeling I'd had in the tree was changing into the heady
realization that Bryce and I were alone。
Alone� �
My heart was positively racing as I held the kite out to him。 But before he could take it�察 �
Champ nudged me from behind and I could feel his cold�察 �
wet nose against my skin。
Against my skin�殖 �
I grabbed my jeans in back�察�and that's when I realized the seat of my pants was ripped wide
open。
Bryce laughed a little nervous laugh�察�so I could tell he knew�察�and for once mine were the
cheeks that were beet red。 He took his kite and ran off�察 �
leaving me to inspect the damage。
I did eventually get over the embarrassment of my jeans�察�but I never got over the view。 I kept
thinking of what it felt like to be up so high in that tree。
I wanted to see it�察�to feel it�察�again。 And again。
´´´ Page 18´´´
It wasn't long before I wasn't afraid of being up so high and found the spot that became my
spot。 I could sit there for hours�察�just looking out at the
world。 Sunsets were amazing。 Some days they'd be purple and pink�察�some days they'd be a
blazing orange�察�setting fire to clouds across the
horizon。
It was on a day like that when my father's notion of the whole being greater than the sum of
its parts moved from my head to my heart。 The view
from my sycamore was more than rooftops and clouds and wind and colors bined。
It was magic。
And I started marveling at how I was feeling both humble and majestic。 How was that
possible�拭�How could I be so full of peace and full of
wonder�拭�How could this simple tree make me feel so plex�拭�So alive。
I went up the tree every chance I got。 And in junior high that became almost every day
because the bus to our school picks up on Collier Street�察 �
right in front of the sycamore tree。
At first I just wanted to see how high I could get before the bus pulled up�察�but before long I
was leaving the house early so I could get clear up to
my spot to see the sun rise�察�or the birds flutter about�察�or just the other kids converge on the
curb。
I tried to convince the kids at the bus stop to climb up with me�察�even a little ways�察�but all of
them said they didn't want to get dirty。 Turn down a
chance to feel magic for fear of a little dirt�拭�I couldn't believe it。
I'd never told my mother about climbing the tree。 Being the truly sensible adult that she is�察 �
she would have told me it was too dangerous。 My
brothers�察�being brothers�察�wouldn't have cared。
That left my father。 The one person I knew would understand。 Still�察�I was afraid to tell him。
He'd tell my mother and pretty soon they'd insist that I
stop。 So I kept quiet�察�kept climbing�察�and felt a somewhat lonely joy as I looked out over the
world。
Then a few months ago I found myself talking to the tree。 An entire conversation�察�just me and
a tree。 And on the climb down I felt lik
酔楯荷恬: 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ○ 賜 ★ 辛酔堀貧和鍬匈 梓囚徒貧議 Enter 囚辛指欺云慕朕村匈 梓囚徒貧圭�鮗� ● 辛指欺云匈競何!
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