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d　be　the　best　idea。　I　breathed　again。　My　rigid　body　relaxed。　Shouldn　t　have　asked。　What　was　I　Seattle　was　just　an　excuse；　after　all。　thinking？　Bet　it　s　that　freak；　Cullen　Why？　he　asked　sullenly。　I　think　she　hesitated。　And　if　you　ever　repeat　what　I　m　saying　right　now　I　will　cheerfully　beat　you　to　death　I　laughed　out　loud　at　the　sound　of　a　death　threat　ing　through　her　lips。　shrieked；　startled；　and　launched　itself　away　from　me。　But　I　think　that　would　hurt　Jessica　s　feelings。　Jessica？　What？　But　Oh。　Okay。　I　guess　So　Huh。　A　jay　His　thoughts　were　no　longer　coherent。　Really；　Mike；　are　you　blind？　I　echoed　her　sentiment。　She　shouldn　t　expect　everyone　to　be　as　perceptive　as　she　was；　but　really　this　instance　was　beyond　obvious。　With　as　much　trouble　as　Mike　had　had　working　himself　up　to　ask　Bella　out；　did　he　imagine　it　wasn　t　just　as　difficult　for　Jessica？　It　must　be　selfishness　that　made　him　blind　to　others。　she　saw　everything。　And　Bella　was　so　unselfish；

Jessica。　Huh。　Wow。　Huh。　Oh；　he　managed　to　say。　Bella　used　his　confusion　to　make　her　exit。　It　s　time　for　class；　and　I　can　t　be　late　again。　Mike　became　an　unreliable　viewpoint　from　then　on。　He　found；　as　he　turned　the　idea　of　Jessica　around　and　around　in　his　head；　that　he　rather　liked　the　thought　of　her　finding　him　attractive。　It　was　second　place；　not　as　good　as　if　Bella　had　felt　that　way。　She　s　cute；　though；　I　guess。　Decent　body。　A　bird　in　the　hand　He　was　off　then；　on　to　new　fantasies　that　were　just　as　vulgar　as　the　ones　about　Bella；　but　now　they　only　irritated　rather　than　infuriated。　How　little　he　deserved　either　girl；　they　were　almost　interchangeable　to　him。　I　stayed　clear　of　his　head　after　that。　When　she　was　out　of　sight；　I　curled　up　against　the　cool　trunk　of　an　enormous　madrone　tree　and　I　danced　from　mind　to　mind；　keeping　her　in　sight；　always　glad　when　Angela　Weber　was　available　to　look　through。　I　wished　there　was　someway　to　thank　the　Weber　girl　for　simply　being　a　nice　person。　It　made　me　feel　better　to　think　that　Bella　had　one　friend　worth　having。　I　watched　Bella　s　face　from　whichever　angle　I　was　given；　and　I　could　see　that　she　was　sad　again。　This　surprised　me　I　thought　the　sun　would　be　enough　to　keep　her　smiling。　At　lunch；　I　saw　her　glance　time　and　time　again　toward　the　empty　Cullen　table；　and　that　thrilled　me。　It　gave　me　hope。　Perhaps　she　missed　me；　too。　She　had　plans　to　go　out　with　the　other　girls　I　automatically　planned　my　own　surveillance　but　these　plans　were　postponed　when　Mike　invited　Jessica　out　on　the　date　he　d　planned　for　Bella。　So　I　went　straight　to　her　home　instead；　doing　a　quick　sweep　of　the　woods　to　make　sure　no　one　dangerous　had　wandered　too　close。　I　knew　Jasper　had　warned　his　oime　brother　to　avoid　the　town　citing　my　insanity　as　both　explanation　and　warning　but　I　wasn　t　taking　any　chances。　Peter　and　Charlotte　had　no　intention　of　causing　animosity　with　my　family；　but　intentions　were　changeable　things　All　right；　I　was　overdoing　it。　I　knew　that。　As　if　she　knew　I　was　watching；　as　if　she　took　pity　on　the　agony　I　felt　when　I　couldn　t　see　her；　Bella　came　out　to　the　backyard　after　a　long　hour　indoors。　She　had　a　book　in　her　hand　and　a　blanket　under　her　arm。　Silently；　I　climbed　into　the　higher　branches　of　the　closest　tree　overlooking　the　yard。　She　spread　the　blanket　on　the　damp　grass　and　then　lay　on　her　stomach　and　started　flipping　through　the　worn　book；　as　if　trying　to　find　her　place。　I　read　over　her　shoulder。　Ah　more　classics。　She　was　an　Austen　fan。　She　read　quickly；　crossing　and　recrossing　her　ankles　in　the　air。　I　was　watching　the　sunlight　and　wind　play　in　her　hair　when　her　body　suddenly　stiffened；　and　her　hand　froze　on　the　page。　All　I　saw　was　that　she　d　reached　chapter　three　when　she　roughly　grabbed　a　thick　section　of　pages　and　shoved　them　over。

I　caught　a　glance　of　a　title　page；　Mansfield　Park。　She　was　starting　a　new　story　the　book　was　a　pilation　of　novels。　I　wondered　why　she　d　switched　stories　so　abruptly。　Just　a　few　moments　later；　she　slammed　the　book　angrily　shut。　With　a　fierce　scowl　on　her　face；　she　pushed　the　book　aside　and　flipped　over　onto　her　back。　She　took　a　deep　breath；　as　if　to　calm　herself；　pushed　her　sleeves　up　and　closed　her　eyes。　I　remembered　the　novel；　but　I　couldn　t　think　of　anything　offensive　in　it　to　upset　her。　Another　mystery。　I　sighed。　She　lay　very　still；　moving　just　once　to　yank　her　hair　away　from　her　face。　It　fanned　out　over　her　head；　a　river　of　chestnut。　And　then　she　was　motionless　again。　Her　breathing　slowed。　After　several　long　minutes　her　lips　began　to　tremble。　Mumbling　in　her　sleep。　Impossible　to　resist。　I　listened　as　far　out　as　I　could；　catching　voices　in　the　houses　nearby。　Two　tablespoons　of　flour　one　cup　of　milk　C　mon！　Get　it　through　the　hoop！　Aw；　c　mon！　Red；　or　blue　or　maybe　I　should　wear　something　more　casual　There　was　no　one　close　by。　I　jumped　to　the　ground；　landing　silently　on　my　toes。　This　was　very　wrong；　very　risky。　How　condescendingly　I　d　once　judged　Emmett　for　his　thoughtless　ways　and　Jasper　for　his　lack　of　discipline　and　now　I　was　consciously　flouting　all　the　rules　with　a　wild　abandon　that　made　their　lapses　look　like　nothing　at　all。　I　used　to　be　the　responsible　one。　I　sighed；　but　crept　out　into　the　sunshine；　regardless。　I　avoided　looking　at　myself　in　the　sun　s　glare。　It　was　bad　enough　that　my　skin　was　stone　and　inhuman　in　shadow；　I　didn　t　want　to　look　at　Bella　and　myself　side　by　side　in　the　sunlight。　The　difference　between　us　was　already　insurmountable；　painful　enough　without　this　image　also　in　my　head。　But　I　couldn　t　ignore　the　rainbow　sparkles　that　reflected　onto　her　skin　when　I　got　closer。　My　jaw　locked　at　the　sight。　Could　I　be　any　more　of　a　freak？　terror　if　she　opened　her　eyes　now　I　imagined　her　I　started　to　retreat；　but　she　mumbled　again；　holding　me　there。　Mmm　Mmm。　Well；　I　would　wait　for　a　bit。　Nothing　intelligible。　I　carefully　stole　her　book；　stretching　my　arm　out　and　holding　my　breath　while　I　was　close；　just　in　case。　I　started　breathing　again　when　I　was　a　few　yards　away；　tasting　the　way　the　sunshine　and　open　air　affected　her　scent。　The　heat　seemed　to　sweeten　the　smell。

My　throat　flamed　with　desire；　the　fire　fresh　and　fierce　again　because　I　had　been　away　from　her　for　too　long。　I　spent　a　moment　controlling　that；　and　then　forcing　myself　to　breathe　through　my　nose　I　let　her　book　fall　open　in　my　hands。　She　d　started　with　the　first　book　I　flipped　through　the　pages　quickly　to　the　third　chapter　of　Sense　and　Sensibility；　searching　for　something　potentially　offensive　in　Austen　s　overly　polite　prose。　When　my　eyes　stopped　automatically　at　my　name　the　character　Edward　Ferrars　being　introduced　for　the　first　time　Bella　spoke　again。　Mmm。　Edward。　She　sighed。　This　time　I　did　not　fear　that　she　had　awoken。　Her　voice　was　just　a　low；　wistful　murmur。　Not　the　scream　of　fear　it　would　have　been　if　she　d　seen　me　now。　Joy　warred　with　selfloathing。　Edmund。　Edmund？　Ha！　She　wasn　t　dreaming　of　me　at　all；　I　realized　blackly。　The　selfloathing　returned　in　force。　She　was　dreaming　of　fictional　characters。　So　much　for　my　conceit。　I　replaced　her　book；　and　stole　back　into　the　cover　of　the　shadows　where　I　belonged。　The　afternoon　passed　and　I　watched；　feeling　helpless　again；　as　the　sun　slowly　sank　in　the　sky　and　the　shadows　crawled　across　the　lawn　toward　her。　I　wanted　to　push　them　back；　but　the　darkness　was　inevitable；　the　shadows　took　her。　When　the　light　was　gone；　her　skin　looked　too　pale　ghostly。　Her　hair　was　dark　again；　almost　black　against　her　face。　It　was　a　frightening　thing　to　watch　like　witnessing　Alice　s　visions　e　to　fruition。　Bella　s　steady；　strong　heartbeat　was　the　only　reassurance；　the　sound　that　kept　this　moment　from　feeling　like　a　nightmare。　I　was　relieved　when　her　father　arrived　home。　I　could　hear　little　from　him　as　he　drove　down　the　street　toward　the　house。　Some　vague　annoyance　in　the　past；　something　from　his　day　at　work。　Expectation　mixed　with　hunger　I　guessed　that　he　was　looking　forward　to　dinner。　But　his　thoughts　were　so　quiet　and　contained　that　I　could　not　be　sure　I　was　right；　I　only　got　the　gist　of　them。　I　wondered　what　her　mother　sounded　like　what　the　geic　bination　had　been　that　had　formed　her　so　uniquely。　Bella　started　awake；　jerking　up　to　a　sitting　position　when　the　tires　of　her　father　s　car　hit　the　brick　driveway。　She　stared　around　herself；　seeming　confused　by　the　unexpected　darkness。　For　one　brief　moment；　her　eyes　touched　the　shadows　where　I　hid；　but　they　flickered　quickly　away。　Charlie？　she　asked　in　a　low　voice；　still　peering　into　the　trees　surrounding　the　Ahh。　Too　。close　She　was　still　dreaming　of　me；　at　least。

small　yard。　The　door　of　his　car　slammed　shut；　and　she　looked　to　the　sound。　She　got　to　her　feet　quickly　and　gathered　her　things；　casting　one　more　look　back　toward　the　woods。　I　moved　into　a　tree　closer　to　the　back　window　near　the　small　kitchen；　and　listened　to　their　evening。　It　was　interesting　to　pare　Charlie　s　words　to　his　muffled　thoughts。　His　love　and　concern　for　his　only　daughter　were　nearly　overwhelming；　and　yet　his　words　were　always　terse　and　casual。　Most　of　the　time；　they　sat　in　panionable　silence。　I　heard　her　discuss　her　plans　for　the　following　evening　in　Port　Angeles；　and　I　refined　my　own　plans　as　I　listened。　Jasper　had　not　warned　Peter　and　Charlotte　to　stay　clear　of　Port　Angeles。　Though　I　knew　that　they　had　fed　recently　and　had　no　intention　of　hunting　any　where　in　the　vicinity　of　our　home；　I　would　watch　her；　just　in　case。　After　all；　there　were　always　others　of　my　kind　out　there。　And　then；　all　those　human　dangers　that　I　had　never　much　considered　before　now。　I　heard　her　worry　aloud　about　leaving　her　father　to　prepare　dinner　alone；　and　smiled　at　this　proof　to　my　theory　yes；　she　was　a　caretaker。　And　then　I　left；　knowing　I　would　return　when　she　was　asleep。　I　would　not　trespass　on　her　privacy　the　way　the　peeping　tom　would　have。　I　was　here　for　her　protection；　not　to　leer　at　her　in　the　way　Mike　Newton　no　doubt　would；　were　he　agile　enough　to　move　through　the　treetops　the　way　I　could。　I　would　not　treat　her　so　crassly。　My　house　was　empty　when　I　returned；　which　was　fine　by　me。　I　didn　t　miss　the　confused　or　disparaging　thoughts；　questioning　my　sanity。　Emmett　had　left　a　note　stuck　to　the　newel　post。　Football　at　the　Rainier　field　c　mon！　Please？　The　teams　were　even　I　found　a　pen　and　scrawled　the　word　sorry　beneath　his　plea。　without　me；　in　any　case。　I　went　for　the　shortest　of　hunting　trips；　contenting　myself　with　the　smaller；　gentler　creatures　that　did　not　taste　as　good　as　the　hunters；　and　then　changed　into　fresh　clothes　before　I　ran　back　to　Forks。　Bella　did　not　sleep　as　well　tonight。　She　thrashed　in　her　blankets；　her　face　sometimes　worried；　sometimes　sad。　I　wondered　what　nightmare　haunted　her　and　then　realized　that　perhaps　I　really　didn　t　want　to　know。　When　she　spoke；　she　mostly　muttered　derogatory　things　about　Forks　in　a　glum　voice。　Only　once；　when　she　sighed　out　the　words　e　back　and　her　hand　twitched　open　a　wordless　plea　did　I　have　a　chance　to　hope　she　might　be　dreaming　of　me。　The　next　day　of　school；　the　last　day　the　sun　would　hold　me　prisoner；　was　much　the　same　as　the　day　before。　Bella　seemed　even　gloomier　than　yesterday；　and　I　wondered　if　she　would　bow　out　of　her　plans　she　didn　t　seem　in　the　mood。　But；　being　Bella；　she　would　probably　put　her　friends　enjoyment　above　that　of　her　own。　She　wore　a　deep　blue　blouse　today；　and　the　color　set　her　skin　off　perfectly；　making　it　look　like　fresh　cream。　School　ended；　and　Jessica　agreed　to　pick　the　other　girls　up　Angela　was　going；　too；

for　which　I　was　grateful。　I　went　home　to　get　my　car。　When　I　found　that　Peter　and　Charlotte　were　there；　I　decided　could　afford　to　give　the　girls　an　hour　or　so　for　a　head　start。　I　would　never　be　able　to　bear　following　behind　them；　driving　at　the　speed　limit　hideous　thought。　I　came　in　through　the　kitchen；　nodding　vaguely　at　Emmett　s　and　Esme　s　greetings　as　I　passed　by　everyone　in　the　front　room　and　went　straight　to　the　piano。　Ugh；　he　s　back。　Rosalie；　of　course。　Ah；　Edward。　I　hate　to　see　him　suffering　so。　Esme　s　joy　was　being　marred　by　concern。　She　should　be　concerned。　This　love　story　she　envisioned　for　me　was　careening　toward　a　tragedy　more　perceptibly　every　moment。　Have　fun　in　Port　Angeles　tonight；　Alice　thought　cheerfully。　allowed　to　talk　to　Bella。　Let　me　know　when　I　m　You　re　pathetic。　I　can　t　believe　you　missed　the　game　last　night　just　to　watch　somebody　sleep；　Emmett　grumbled。　Jasper　paid　me　no　mind；　even　when　the　song　I　played　came　out　a　little　more　stormily　than　I　d　intended。　It　was　an　old　song；　with　a　familiar　theme：　impatience。　Jasper　was　saying　goodbye　to　his　friends；　who　eyed　me　curiously。　What　a　strange　creature；　the　Alicesized；　whiteblond　Charlotte　was　thinking。　he　was　so　normal　and　pleasant　the　last　time　we　met。　Peter　s　thoughts　were　in　sync　with　hers；　as　was　usually　the　case。　It　must　be　the　animals。　The　lack　of　human　blood　drives　them　mad　eventually；　he　was　concluding。　His　hair　was　just　as　fair　as　hers；　and　almost　as　long。　They　were　very　similar　except　for　size；　as　he　was　almost　as　tall　as　Jasper　in　both　look　and　thought。　A　well　matched　pair；　I　d　always　thought。　Everyone　but　Esme　stopped　thinking　about　me　after　a　moment；　and　I　played　in　more　subdued　tones　so　that　I　would　not　attract　notice。　I　did　not　pay　attention　to　them　for　a　long　while；　just　letting　the　music　distract　me　from　my　unease。　It　was　hard　to　have　the　girl　out　of　sight　and　mind。　I　only　returned　my　attention　to　their　conversation　when　the　goodbyes　grew　more　final。　If　you　see　Maria　again；　Jasper　was　saying；　a　little　warily；　tell　her　I　wish　her　well。　Maria　was　the　vampire　who　had　created　both　Jasper　and　Peter　Jasper　in　the　latter　half　of　the　nieenth　century；　Peter　more　recently；　in　the　nieen　forties。　She　d　looked　Jasper　up　once　when　we　were　in　Calgary。　It　had　been　an　eventful　visit　we　d　had　to　move　immediately。　Jasper　had　politely　asked　her　to　keep　her　distance　in　the　future。　I　don　t　imagine　that　will　happen　soon；　Peter　said　with　a　laugh　Maria　was　undeniable　dangerous　and　there　was　not　much　love　lost　between　her　and　Peter。　Peter　had；　after　all；　been　instrumental　in　Jasper　s　defection。　Jasper　had　always　been　Maria　s　favorite；　she　considered　it　a　minor　detail　that　she　had　once　planned　to　kill　him。　But；　should　it　happen；　I　certainly　will。　And

They　were　shaking　hands　then；　preparing　to　depart。　I　let　the　song　I　was　playing　trail　off　to　an　unsatisfying　end；　and　got　hastily　to　my　feet。　Charlotte；　Peter；　I　said；　nodding。　It　was　nice　to　see　you　again；　Edward；　Charlotte　said　doubtfully。　nodded　in　return。　Madman；　Emmett　threw　after　me。　Idiot；　Rosalie　thought　at　the　same　time。　Poor　boy。　Esme。　No　where　Peter　just　And　Alice；　in　a　chiding　tone。　They　re　going　straight　east；　to　Seattle。　near　Port　Angeles。　She　showed　me　the　proof　in　her　visions。　I　pretended　I　hadn　t　heard　that。　My　excuses　were　already　flimsy　enough。　Once　in　my　car；　I　felt　more　relaxed；　the　robust　purr　of　the　engine　Rosalie　had　boosted　for　me　last　year；　when　she　was　in　a　better　mood　was　soothing。　It　was　a　relief　to　be　in　motion；　to　know　that　I　was　getting　closer　to　Bella　with　every　mile　that　flew　away　under　my　tires。　9。　Port　Angeles　It　was　too　bright　for　me　to　drive　into　town　when　I　got　to　Port　Angeles；　the　sun　was　still　too　high　overhead；　and；　though　my　windows　were　tinted　dark；　there　was　no　reason　to　take　unnecessary　risks。　More　unnecessary　risks；　I　should　say。　I　was　certain　I　would　be　able　to　find　Jessica　s　thoughts　from　a　distance　Jessica　s　thoughts　were　louder　than　A